In a previous post I mentioned my terrifying experience on a bus ride from Leyva to Bucaramanga. I also mentioned how it was by far the most anxious I've been in a moving vehicle. Well, I spoke to soon.
On a daily basis, I relive that terror in the backseat of various taxis.
The ubiquitous yellow taxis are very convenient to catch, and overall they are reasonably priced. This is how they get you into their vehicle. What you don't realize is that all taxis operate under a set of unspoken rules, I like to think of it as a Palahniuk-esque:
#1: The First Rule of Driving in South America is that there are No Rules about Driving.
As it turns out taxis are immune to any and all traffic regulations that pertain to driving in Colombia--a leniency that is also given to motorbikes, bicycles, buses, people, burros, etc.
When I was first learning to drive, my mother taught me about defensive driving, which is the ideology that not only do you drive safe, but you proactively monitor other drivers as well so you are aware of your surroundings and can react if something occurs.
Taxi drivers adhere to the tenets of aggressive driving.
Cutting everyone off, riding their bumper, honking, weaving in and out of traffic on both lanes, through motorcyclists, bikers, people, dogs, you name it, and off course the speed needs to be maintained between fast and faster...unless as a last, split second resort you need to brake by using the emergency brake system.
The bus system is another wonder altogether. The companies all advertise "expresso" or "directo" which is a complete scam because they'll pull over anywhere to get more passengers on board, and often will stop for the driver's 30-45min lunch. Other scams they taught are WIFI, air conditioning, toilets, and departure time. If they provide WIFI it is often too slow to surf. If they provide A/C it means that the windows of the bus open. They'll let you use the toilet while the driver is eating. They'll leave once the bus is full and not until which makes the departure time of 10am anywhere between 930am and 11am.
The bus drivers will let vendors and beggars on board. People will get on the bus and pass out a candy or something to everybody on board, then they will proceed to announce to the bus their life story and go about collecting the candy back from those that don't pay. Vendors will pop on every stop (because there's no such thing as direct) and sell fried pork skins, crisps, beverages, empanadas, hominy, razors, cheese, fruits, bread, and anything else imaginable. What's more fun than some guy doing Christian rap while you're traveling, perhaps a guitar or an accordion solo? Yep, those happen too and you are expected to pay the performer.
Things we learned:
Get to the station early
Avoid Sunday travel (because everything is closed)
Bring your own TP (if they do have a baño)
Bring your bags on board (anybody has unassisted access to the storage below)
Get to the station early
Avoid Sunday travel (because everything is closed)
Bring your own TP (if they do have a baño)
Bring your bags on board (anybody has unassisted access to the storage below)
